Carl the Corrector
The guy I thought was on my wavelength.
It started with a cute guy from church, flowers on Halloween, shared faith, and one little impression that made me think maybe I'd finally found someone who really understood me. Then came the dealbreakers, the corrections, the red light I kept trying to turn green...and a relationship that taught me more about finding my voice than I ever expected.
Carl's story turned out to be way too big for one Dating Detour. There was the beginning I was SO excited about, the things I didn't know when I said yes, all those little “Hmm...interesting” moments, the spiritual confusion, the breakup...and eventually the lesson hidden inside those words: “He's on your wavelength.”
So this one became a series.
Start from the beginning... ❤️
Carl makes a lot more sense in order. Trust me. 😂
The Guy I Thought Was on My Wavelength
I recognized Carl from Facebook, accidentally failed to send him my phone number, and somehow ended up on a pumpkin-patch date with a guy who seemed to check a LOT of the boxes I had been hoping for. Then came flowers, a kiss, and my brand-new boyfriend.
READ PART ONE →So Much for Taking It Slow...
I finally had the boyfriend I was so excited about. Then, within days, I learned things about Carl's story that landed directly on dealbreakers I had already decided mattered to me—and suddenly I started negotiating with myself.
READ PART TWO →The Red Light I Tried to Turn Green
I asked God for direction...and got an answer I really didn't want. So instead of following it, I started building a very convincing case for why the relationship should work anyway.
READ PART THREE →When I Started Losing My Voice
The hardest part wasn't that Carl had opinions. It was realizing how often I stopped saying mine. Somewhere between the corrections, my dealbreakers, and trying SO hard to make the relationship work, I started editing my own experience.
READ PART FOUR →The Breakup & What “Same Wavelength” Actually Meant
By Christmas, everything I'd pushed to the back burner was boiling over. Then Carl and I finally had the conversation we'd both been avoiding—and I began to understand that maybe the original impression hadn't been wrong after all.
READ PART FIVE →What This Relationship Actually Taught Me
The relationship ended, but the lessons definitely didn't. This is the part where I step out of the story and look at what Carl taught me about compatibility, communication, listening to myself, spiritual discernment, and what I actually need in a relationship.
COMING SOONAnd then there are the little stories... 👀
Because five main chapters still weren't enough to hold every Carl moment. 😂 These are the smaller stories that didn't need to interrupt the main relationship arc—but definitely helped me understand it later.
The Christmas Party
One of those moments that seemed small while I was living it...and felt a little more revealing in hindsight.
STORY COMING SOONMy Mom Made Him His OWN Ranch...and It Still Went Wrong
My mom went out of her way to make something specifically for Carl. Somehow, ranch dressing still became one of the moments I remembered later.
STORY COMING SOONThe Tone-Deaf Moment
A comment that landed very differently than Carl seemed to realize—and another little moment I wasn't quite sure what to do with at the time.
STORY COMING SOONApparently, I'd Been Loading the Dishwasher Wrong My Whole Life
The dishwasher correction that seemed tiny at the time...and eventually became the beginning of a pattern.
STORY COMING SOONI Couldn't Wait to Dance With My Boyfriend...Until 😬💃
Dancing was something I already loved and felt confident doing. Somehow, doing it with my boyfriend started feeling very different.
STORY COMING SOONDifferent Learning Styles...It Showed Up in More Than I Realized
At first I thought Carl and I simply learned differently. Eventually I realized our approaches to growth, feedback, and influence were showing up inside the relationship too.
STORY COMING SOONApparently, I've Been Saying “Windowsill” Wrong
Yes. Windowsill. 😂 One pronunciation correction became another tiny addition to my growing Hmm...interesting file.
STORY COMING SOONThe Rock-Climbing Lesson I Didn't Actually Need
I already knew what I was doing. Carl slipped naturally into the teaching role anyway—and I started noticing something familiar in the way he interacted with people close to him.
STORY COMING SOONThe Perfume He Wouldn't Admit He Didn't Like
A tiny perfume conversation that ended up showing me something much bigger about honesty, conflict, and what happens when people avoid simply saying what they think.
STORY COMING SOON“Where Does It Say That in the Scriptures?”
I made a playful comment about talking to animals. Carl responded with a question I definitely wasn't expecting—and I learned something about those little bids for connection.
STORY COMING SOONThe Studio Ghibli Incident
Studio Ghibli wasn't a dealbreaker. 😂 But sharing something that felt like a little piece of me ended up becoming its own surprisingly meaningful relationship moment.
STORY COMING SOONThis relationship taught me a lot.
Carl didn't have to be a bad guy for us to be wrong together. We really did share faith, values, interests, and a lot of the things I thought I was looking for.
Maybe we really were on the same wavelength.
I just learned that wavelength isn't the only thing that matters. ❤️
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